I had intended this post originally to let everyone know how fantastic things are. I haven't posted anything for our family and friends lately and for that I am sorry.
As a quick recap, since Temperances birth we had a nice summer hanging out with family then our good friends. The winter was hard for us although it was a relatively warm one. We stayed inside, saw very few people and only went out a handful of times to run errands.
The past two weeks here have been beautiful! We've been outdoors almost every day playing, going for walks, grilling and having picnics. The exercise and extra vitamin D have done wonders for our attitudes!
Amie is doing fantastic in preK. She has made some wonderful friends and has made great strides in both her educational and behavior. We have very few melt downs these days.
Matty will be seen be a speech therapist soon to make sure his teeth (or lack of) is not causing a problem. He's deffinately a two year old, he has his moments, but we are doing a great job of keeping on top of the "naughty" behavior.
Temperance is the cutest little baby doll. Her name suits her very well, she is typically reserved yet will let you know when she's bothered. She eats constantly! She's my best eater yet (I hope Amies good eating streak gets better.) We just noticed two little ridges in her mouth, Tempy has her bottom front teeth! She's ready to walk any day now, I'll let you know when that happens.
As for us (small) big people... We're doing our best to get through each day. I don't think either of us are happy but what can we do? Our only friends are moving next week and although I'd love to see them before they leave I have a gut feeling they want nothing to do with us. (yes, moving is stressful. My judgement comes from a specific heated conversation about my bad parenting choices not just their heir busy schedule.) I've had a couple of those conversations lately. I'd like to pose a question to everyone, if you'd like to discuss it further, email me. Please don't make your opinion public because it's not a public debate or forum/social smack down. The question: Is it anyone's place to tell a parent how they should or should not be raising, handling, punishing, etc. their child? (the exception being when someone is put in harms way.) My opinion, we seek professional assistance for the problems we can't handle on our own and we educate ourselves on how to parent more effectively. How I choose to parent my children from there is only mine and my husbands business. ( once again, please email me about this, I hate to see educated debates turn into catty fights over who's opinion is right. A{dot}Scott{one,two,eight,seven}@gmail{dot}com) I can't wait till the military is not a part of our lives anymore.
A.scott
Personally I think that if neither of you are happy then you need to do something about it other than complain. You either need to spend more time together, less time together, join in extracurricular activities either together or separate to meet people or if none of those will work, talk about divorce.
ReplyDeleteAs far as your parenting style goes I think airing your dirty laundry on the internet and not allowing comments that other people can see is not the way to go about it. You are choosing to put things out there and the people who read your blog should have the choice to respond however they see fit. Every parent screws up, some more than others. If you or someone close to you have concerns about how you are raising your children you need to talk to your husband and do something about it, not just sit there and say 'Well so-and-so doesn't like my parenting stye or choices so I'm going to call them out on the internet.' I do believe that if you are doing a crappy job of raising your kids and people see that they should have the right to call you out on it. I would expect my friends to say 'Hey you know you're kid's a brat right?' because then I could do something about it to change why my kid is acting they way it is. Do I think someone other than myself should punish my child? No but that doesn't mean that I don't expect people to turn a blind eye when or if my kid is acting up. I often seek parenting advice from my close friends and vise versa. Have you ever heard the saying 'It takes a village to raise a child?' It's hard HARD work raising kids and a person should ask others about how to handle situations that are beyond their control. That being said if your friend brought something to your attention then maybe there is a reason for it and you need to do something other than what you are currently doing because it obviously isn't working. Stop acting like you know everything and step back and say 'I need help because I have no clue what to do anymore.' And just because you have taken a few college courses doesn't mean you know everything. Stop acting like you are better than everyone else and placing blame on other people for your own short comings/mistakes. You need to accept responsibility for your actions because it's very possible that these friends of yours do have some legitimate complaints about your parenting styles.
To the poster of the previous comment:
ReplyDeleteWe do seek help from our friends and family in raising our children. I often ask for advice on how to better deal with something and when we see no results we try new methods. Not that it is your business but my family is involved in a parenting program that observes my children and my interactions with them. Afterwards we are instructed on which behaviors, both theirs and mine, are working well or not at all and how to correct the current problem. Considering my children are all very young it is to be expected that they will act up. In which case, I deal with the behavior in the method that best suits the problem. I chose not to be selfish and remove my childs ability to make decisions to behave on their own. If that means that at 2 years old I have to remind my child often to hold my hand as we cross the street thats what I will do.
As for the comment about airing dirty laundry, everyone has it. I'd be a fool to pretend that my life is perfect or I have everything figured out. If you've chosen to make hate and dissent a part of the public forum so be it, I cannot force you to be pleasant. Obviously I do allow comments. Moderating comments only allows me to make sure your post is not inappropriate or full of advertisements.